See Also: Teri Hatcher (Susan Mayer) People Guide

After bravely revealing that she was sexually abused by her uncle as a child earlier in the year, Teri Hatcher (Susan Mayer) has a new lease on life. Confronting her demons, positive about the future and promoting her new book Burnt Toast—Hatcher has been doing the promotional rounds in the UK and talking about everything from forgiving her parents to how she's really not like Susan.

"It's been a difficult process for me, and it was something I should have reported a long, long time ago, but somehow I never could," she told Woman magazine, talking about her decision to inform police about her past after a girl her uncle abused committed suicide. "I just hope that others will be able to find the strength to report incidents of sexual abuse and molestation. It's not easy to overcome the guilt and stigma, and dredging up horrible memories, but once you do, you feel ready to move on with your life. Now that I can talk about this, and I don't have to hide behind my fears any more, it actually feels very liberating."

The name of Hatcher's book, Burnt Toast, is a metaphor for how women are happy to give the good toast to others and eat the burnt toast for themselves. The main focus of the book is that women need to increase their confidence and to treat themselves better. "I think a lot of women carry around a lot of guilt and pain and believe that everything is their fault," she said. "I spent a long time feeling that way and I still live with that guilt. My idea is writing my book is to show that guilt and punishing themselves psychologically. We can learn how to feel good about ourselves and have the kind of life we want. I try to use a lot of my own experiences about how I've made mistakes and how I've fought those negative feelings."

Hatcher recently presented an award at the Glamour Awards, and when she came on stage she started removing some of her hair and took of her shoes. In an appearance on Friday Night With Jonathan Ross, she said that she was inspired by Emma Thompson who was on stage before her. "Emma was talking about this charity she's involved with, The Helen Bamber Foundation, helenbamber.org, and it's an organization that helps women regain confidence for whatever reason they're in that situation. Emma was talking about how it took her into her 40s to be able to go to these sort of awards ceremonies, get all glammed up and to be able to find tat genuine confidence.

"It reminded me of some of the subject matter I talk about in my book, where there is this illusion that we feel so great and we're so secure. And so when I went up there I was move by what she said, and I wanted to admit to everybody that one of the little things a lot of us women in Hollywood—myself included—do, is we put extra hair in our hair to make it look thicker and fuller, and we shove our shoes into fee that don't fit. So as I was telling this I started to take my extra hair out, [and took my shoes off] and we're auctioning them off for Helen's charity." When asked on the show her hair was all hers, she said it was. So why put in fake hair? "Because of insecurities, and that's something to get over and something I work on getting over, and other women work on getting over."

Speaking to You magazine, she said that her ex-husband Jon Tenney knew of the abuse and that the pressure of the abuse contributed to the collapse of her marriage. "He knew, yeah. The case and the girl who killed herself happened right before we got divorced and it was a factor; it changed me. We already had problems but that sealed it." At this point Hatcher cried in the interview. "Isn't it amazing that, as a 41-year-old woman, I can still feel that the abuse was my fault? That I am a bad, bad person?"

Hatcher said that crying had been a problem recently, but the cast have helped her. "It was as if all this pain was seeping form me. Every day I would say, 'I'm not going to cry,' and by one o'clock I would be sobbing again ... but the people on set were incredible. All the other women in the show were so supportive."

One of the positive things to come from opening up about the abuse she suffered is a new understanding with her parents. "You know, my grandmother died of lung cancer when my mom was three," she said. "[My mom] has a horrible memory of her mother going off to hospital and never coming back. So I can't blame her; I am so sad for her—what a crummy way to spend your life. My parents did their best. We were very isolated from each other as I was growing up. Mom had a career, but it wasn't that, it was all she knew how to be. We didn't have warm and fuzzy, which is what I have with [my daughter] Emerson."

She also said that her father has opened up a lot to her about the decisions he made when bringing her up. "He said that when I was growing up he purposefully withheld affection from me because he thought I was smart and funny and cute and talented but he never wanted me to have a big head, so he didn't give me too much positive feedback. He thought he was doing the right thing. If he hadn't done then maybe I wouldn't have been so needy for affection from someone else, which is how children get sucked into abuse. How great is it for my dad to say something so open and raw and vulnerable, and for me to be able to forgive him?"

She told Woman that she was much more positive about life now and she won't let herself feel down again. "I still can't believe how amazing the past few years have ben for me," she said. "I spent several years feeling sorry for myself but I've got a much better perspective now. I'm never going to let myself get down again. I think I've always been a survivor. I'm a woman who won't give up. I feel now that I can just be myself and enjoy life to the full—there's nothing holding me back now."

Finally, she also appeared on BBC Radio 2's Steve Wright show. She talked about Susan, but said she's not very like her character. "A lot of people kind of assume we're very similar, but in a way we're really not at all," she said. "I'm a very different kind of parent, I'm not anywhere close to that. I'm quite a business woman and multitasker, and what I love about going in to work and getting to play Susan is she is so flawed, and she is so desperately this well intended person that just makes the wrong turn, you know at the last minute. We were fishing up our last season ... and Mark Cherry wrote something where Susan lies once again and I literally called him up and I said 'Really? Has she learned nothing? And you really want to lie again?' And he said 'I don't think of it as lying, I think that she just panics and makes the wrong decision.'"

Even though it's now been off the air for nine years, Hatcher sprung to Lois and Clark's defence after Wright criticized the show, and then talked about how happy she was to be working on Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry ... just had an incredible vision," she said. "I always think of it as he takes all of the intense relatable feelings of suburbia and marriage and relationships, and he distils them all so that they're really really heightened and crazy—but relatable. It's the greatest job ever, I'm never leaving that job. On top of that I film seven minutes from where I live, and so it's convenient, and it's just the greatest group of people ever."

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